Everything dope, including the pope

On the second of May, Donald Trump posted a picture of himself as pope (AI generated, of course). At the time, I brushed it aside as a bad joke.

Pope Francis received J D Vance the day before he died. This is one of the last pictures we have of Francis alive.

Today, May 8, the world learned of Robert Francis following pope Francis as Pope Leo XIV. He was greeted by major news outlets including the guardian, CBS news and some others, and with the catch phrase in my title.

Did Trump know something? This is the first American Citizen pope. Second American pope, if we count Pope Francis’ South American origin. Is an American pope a good thing for Trump? A victory of sorts? Sure, no one would ever think that Trump would reinvent himself as committed to lifelong celibacy and accede to the throne in Vatican. Was the picture an allusion to the American pope to come? Did Trump know? Or, did he guess? A good educated guess? Is he the fool who spoke the truth with this picture?

The choice of name is also surprizing: the new pope will be known as Leo XIV. The first thing that comes to mind is what the previous Pope Leo did. Leo XIII is famous for advertising cocaine, at the time known as a Vin Mariani, and sold by reputable chemists. Sure, Cocaine was a revolutionary drug, and not necessarily always a bad thing. It is the precursor or painkillers we use today usually called xxxx-ine (novocaine, lidocaine, etc).

Later, it was Coca Cola that put cocaine on every sucker’s table, after the US prohibition on alcohol forced the soft drink company to eliminate red wine from the original recipe. People were addicted to alcohol and exposed to Coca-Cola’s revolutionarily refreshing mix of red wine, cocaine and caffeine (from the kola nut). When American Prohibition banned alcohol, CocaCola provided a way for alcohol addicts to satisfy some of their cravings and bridge onto a new, legal addictive substance.

And yet, it is likely Coca Cola in its modern version with only caffeine and sugar is responsible for more loss of life than the old cocaine powered drink. Today’s Coca Cola promotes obesity through its weakly addictive sugar, and may cause more loss of life than its earlier versions as its mild effect is felt by vastly more people.

Last, but not least, I want to remind our readers that pope Leo the XIII was known for his support of education, science and astronomy, and in particular for re-estabilishing the Vatican Observatory in its modern form. He also fought for the right of workers, and for fair and safe working conditions.

Pope Leo XIV, welcome! I hope you will make the world a better place!

I shall raise a glass of whatever drink you come up with!

As for me, I shall continue serving the Church of Galileo Galilei, Giordano Bruno, Isaac Newton, Blaise Pascal, Charles Darwin and others. I wonder how mighty the Catholic Church might have been if it had recognized them as saints instead of bestowing the honor only on others.